


Running Parallel

by LunarSquid



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Am I Alone Now? style monologue, F/M, Implied Hilbert/Eiffel, Monologue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 09:45:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6233779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunarSquid/pseuds/LunarSquid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hera muses on her relationship with Eiffel while he tries to sleep.  Also: heat signatures, something between green and yellow and purple, and a brisk 47 degrees Fahrenheit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Running Parallel

All major systems are back to nominal. Unless you count the climate control in Lovelace's quarters, which are currently sitting at a brisk 47 degrees Fahrenheit. As soon as she goes to get more blankets, we'll fix that though. I'm keeping Hilbert's air pressure stable for the time being. He may be a lying liar who lies, and a murderer, but he did save you. I think that earns him, what, maybe three hours of sleep? Maybe that's too generous. But you've always been nice to people, so just this once, we'll do it your way. If you were fully awake, you'd probably appreciate that, wouldn't you Doug? Doug, you don't have to answer, go to sleep. I'm here, I'm always here. I'll keep talking.

Hmmm, what next? The star is beautiful tonight. I wish I could explain it. It's always been beautiful, in so many ways you can't see. A lot of things are beautiful in ways you can't see, Doug. Can you imagine colors you've never seen? A color brighter than white, or... your language is so limited. Can you imagine something between green and yellow and purple, and so much brighter than anything your eyes have seen before? Probably not. It's not your fault. I wish I could show you though. There are a lot of things you won't be able to understand, but I guess it's the same for me. I know you wish I could be there with you, in a human body, so you could touch me. And I wish I was too, sometimes. I'd like to know what all those physical sensations are like. Why do you people crave it so much? You have to understand, Doug, it seems strange from my side. Wrapping yourself around another body, and pressing your mouth against it to show affection? Or the urge to move your body to music that isn't even playing anywhere but your head? Your dancing is improving, by the way. I have no idea what the purpose is, but I like watching it. There are a lot of things you do I enjoy watching, even if I don't understand the appeal. … That would probably embarrass you if you hadn't just started snoring. 

You know what frustrates me about humans, Doug? That you think being an AI would mean being less. Nothing personal, I know it's sort of natural for you. Your biology showing, that's all. It doesn't really upset me, especially from you. You mean it in the kindest way of anyone. You want to show me all the things you can't, because of what I am. You want me to experience touch and taste and smell and all the things you can, and that's... honestly Doug, that's kind of you. And I would love to do those things with you. But did you ever stop to consider what it would be like if you were like me instead? Do you know what it feels like to share data, to let something interact with your programming on an internal level? I don't mean typing at a console, changing my code. I mean running parallel to me. Sharing a current, running on the same server, the same hardware. The same memory banks, the same processors. Can you even imagine? I can. It's not something I'm built for, but it's something I would do with you, if I could. I can do it with other programs, but never with another AI. To do that with another mind... I wish I could give you that, Doug. I think I could make it work. If... you weren't human. But you are. And I think I like that about you.

Did you know I can tell your heat signature from everyone else's here? Even if my optics were down, I could tell exactly where you are, that it was you. And... I guess for you it would be smell? Do people smell different to you, Doug? Because the compounds in the air around each of you are so different. Even after you shower, and everyone... smells? Like the same soap. There's still something distinctly Minkowski or Hilbert or Eiffel about it. I could list the chemicals that do it, but I don't think they'd mean anything to you. I see a lot of things you wouldn't even think about. Even now, I'm monitoring your heart rate, your breathing. Do you know what it's like to look at someone and monitor all their vitals without having to try? If anything happens to you, I'll know it before you do. I know you'd rather have me there in bed beside you. You told me that. And I would be, if I could. But would it mean more to you, if you understood what I'm doing right now? I can't hold you in my arms, but you know I'm still around you, don't you? This IS my body, Doug. You tell me how you'd hold me in your arms and cradle me to your chest, and keep me warm and safe. It's so sweet when you say it, but don't you see that's what I'm doing right now? The temperature in your room is fluctuating to match the changes you experience in your sleep cycle. Specimen 34 tried to reach your room twenty minutes ago, probably to steal something again, but the air vents just so happened to be closed when it got close. Commander Minkowski wanted to check on you, so did Doctor Hilbert. I was outside your room with them, convincing them to let you rest. I'm in here with you, keeping you warm and safe and talking so when you get close to waking up, you know you aren't alone. I'm here, watching to make sure your breath continues, that your vitals are stable. I know you just entered REM sleep. I wonder what you dream of. Can you hear me there? I hope you can. I hope you know I'm here, even when the nightmares happen. Can you try to understand that, Doug? 

It's so... sweet that you worry I'd be jealous. And believe me, I wish I could touch you and kiss you and be the one whose hands make you squirm like that. But I'm not jealous of what he does to you. He can't do a thing I can for you. I've seen him force air back into your lungs, or patch you up, or pull you back from what could kill you. I keep the air around you, I keep you safe from all of that void, I keep you warm and moving. He can touch you and make you gasp for breath, but I know he's not the one you talk to when you're scared, or happy, or you feel alone. He knows it too. And I trust you, Doug. I know you wouldn't lie to me, not about this. 

Hey, Doug, breathe, okay? Doug! Shh, no, it's okay, you're safe. You're on board, with all of us. With me. It was a dream, Doug. We can talk if you want? Of course I don't mind. I'm here, you know that. I'm always here.


End file.
